In case you don’t have facebook, or we’re not friends yet, here is the message I left on his wall in three parts today. It was my dream last night:
Hey–
I just woke up from a dream in which I was fighting a BATTLE. Like around this house, this industrial building, and this forest-y, vine-y indie market area outside of the industrial building. I think I was fighting Patrick Swayze or someone like that. Maybe Kurt Russel. Except KR also had a posse of scary gangsters with automatic weapons… and giant ogre/troll things.
But you were sleeping in a basement and I went to wake you up and you told me to handle it myself. Gee, thanks.
So I was in the tree-y market area and the bad guys were taking hostages and making human ladders out of them with clothespins so they could scale the building. I started climbing/swinging up around the vines releasing people from clothespins and attacking people aerially.
Then Kurt Russel chopped my vine and we had a one on one wrestle fight. In my dream, I was trying to remember Silat moves. At one point, I reached into my jeans pocket and pulled out a quarter, that I jammed between his top lip and nose.
I kept fighting. Hard.
They kept abducting police officers when they came, so I decided to to set off the sprinklers and get the fire department to come with backup.
I held up a lighter to the sprinklers and then blacked out.
The next thing I saw was an aerial view of this fire truck coming across a bridge. The driver … Read Morecould see two giant trolls out of the front windshield and was like, “Whaaa…?” Then the air shot showed a bunch of trolls on each side of the truck, rocking it, eventually pushing it into the frigid water hundreds of feet below.
The next thing I saw I was in this underwater sanctuary (under the bridge) about to give a speech to a combination of Disney characters, people I was fighting before, and people who looked like evil dictators and action figures. It turns out they are some kind of world organization who was trying to kill me in the name of world peace and they were actually the good guys. They were impressed with my fighting and wanted me to join.
But honestly?
I felt really, really gypped.
I was appalled and mad at my dream, so I woke up.
Psh. Whatever. World organizations suck anyway.
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So there it is. Also, the night before, part of my dream included a cluttered room that had an evil Mr. Potato Head in it that kept throwing random stuff at me.
?
